Advice Ninja Hires Yet Another Health Enthusiast: Foreseen Disaster Finally Happened

Upashna Bhattrai (Advice Ninja, Senior Accountant) arrives at Advice Ninja as a hero just as EOFY begins. Credit goes to Shrhihshthnhihah Manandhar (Advice Ninja, Senior Accountant, Current Guinness Book of World Record holder of Most Hs in a name) for recruiting her best friend #bestfriendforever, thereby boosting the accounting department’s emotional stability and spreadsheet confidence. However, rumors suggest that they might actually be fake friends.

Upashna Bhattrai has been in the professional accounting field for over four years. For people who don’t understand the metric system, that’s essentially before Prashanna was born. Reports suggest that she had learnt accounting together with Shrhihshthnhihah, when they were hunting fishes and forging weapons. It is also said that they first met during a human sacrificial ritual, as their tribes used to live just two caves away from each other. 

According to the survey done by Steven Shrestha (GOATED Surveyist, 2X Arrested for Possession of Marijuana, One Time Arrested for Gang Fight in Machchindra Jatra) in 1974 AD, Upashna had some of the best hardworking cotton pickers back in the day. She wanted to own some from India and whip them, but due to the sad turn of events, she couldn't. And according to Steven’s trustworthy report, there are suspicions raised about how there might be some involvement of Upashna in the Abraham Lincon’s shootout event.

Before joining Advice Ninja, Upashna had been wasting her talent at a company called something like “B-something Tech.” She had arrived at Advice Ninja just as the Australian EOFY began, providing much-needed relief to the overwhelmed accounting team. However, her addition to the team appears to have triggered the inevitable disaster everyone expected. The Ninja family had to be separated into two.

When Shrhshthnhihah was questioned about Upashna, she replied with some boring comment for which we had to keep Google on standby due to her premium vocabs: 

We've already completed the prequel together. This is Season 2. 

Same friendship. New office. Hopefully fewer plot twists, but definitely more coffee, more laughs, more gossip, and more reasons to say, "Remember when...?" Welcome back to the chaos. ❤️

When asked why she chose to join Advice Ninja, Upashna responded: 

The real reason? Shristina.

We trauma-bonded at our old workplace, so naturally we decided to heal together too. Consider this our corporate detox era.

She further added, speaking nothing but fax: 

“It genuinely feels like heaven. I didn’t know a workplace could feel this welcoming until I came here.”

Apart from her exceptional debits and credits skills, what has impressed people even more is her strong health consciousness. Reports suggest that any offer of food other than oats is met with aggressive rejection. According to the news from B-something tech, once a person offered her a chocolate, she refused her so bad that the person had to go through 67 stages of depression. According to some rumours, she might actually be Cristiano Ronaldo in disguise, not only because of her strict diet but also because of how she showed up during such a crucial moment. But sadly, she is supporting Croatia for the World Cup win (lol).

According to the reports, what surprised the people even more than her oats behaviour is her height. She has officially overtaken the title of “The Tallest Ninja” from Anshu Malakar (Advice Ninja, Junior Accountant, former The Tallest Ninja, Mischievous Penguin). Which clears her Cristiano allegations.

According to NIR (Not-Important Records), not long ago, Prashanna’s slippers went missing. Somehow, they mysteriously reappeared right after Prashanna brought a new pair. People have begun to suspect that Shrhshthnhihah and Upashna resumed their masti the moment they were reunited.

Back to the important part; despite Upashna and Shrhshthnhihah claiming to be besties since the Stone Age, onlookers suspect the claim may be false. Rumours around the office have been spreading that they may be fake friends due to the level of courtesy they use with each other during their conversations. According to more rumors, they might actually be conversing in some kind of cha bhasa hidden within their frequent use of courtesy, which they learned when they lived a few caves away from each other. It is said that they are actually bitching about their colleagues in their coded language.

When asked to respond to the rumours that she and Shrhshthnhihah were fake friends, Upashna replied:

Fake friends? Babe, we’ve been through corporate trauma together. That’s a lifetime warranty. (Shrhshthnhihah agrees as she nods in the background)

At the time of publication, the investigation remains ongoing. Upashna was last seen eating oats. Prashanna has also been advised to keep a close eye on his slippers. Viewers are advised to minimize their hate against Indians.